Monday, March 24, 2008

Be Your Own Woman

I have mounds of magazines that I keep on hand for inspiration or for ideas, most of them have been relocated from my grandma's house (whom has the same addiction to glossy pages) and been lovingly put into my collection of worthy past isssues. I have at least one back issue of almost every magazine I can think of. Last night it was a particular issue of Ladies Home Journal that I idly picked up for my bedtime ritual of reading before I go to sleep.

I came across an article that really hit home with me. It deals with societal pressures and what the article refers to as "groupthink", conveying staggering statistics on how little percentage of women are really their own woman. I've struggled with this my entire life, feeling as if I had to go with the flow and make everyone else happy before myself. I can't find the back issue to give you a reference so that you can read it yourself, but it came from the March 2005 issue and these are five tips that come from the article.

1.) Figure out what matters to you-Not Others. We've all been in the situation. The situation where we find ourselves faced with either buying a product that can make us "better" or buying a piece of clothing that we know will be restricting and uncomfortable because we think someone else might like to see it on us. Ask yourself the question, "Is this really important to me?"

2.) Start Small. If you're annoyed at your inability to voice your opinions, wants or desires, start with a small situation, such as something as simple as seeing which movie........where your opinion is at odds with the majority. Be firm, but kind in relaying that your opinion counts and that you are willing to stand up for what will make you happy. Of course, compromise is always there, but being your own woman in small situations goes a long way in affirming the fact that you control your life (in your eyes and others).

3.) Talk Yourself Down. Inner monologue can help squash anxiety or fear about expressing an unpopular opinion or buying shoes you like but that might not be considered stylish. Tell yourself that your opinion counts....but not just counts, it's the only one that matters.

4.) Ask yourself if you are too harsh in judging others. A critical step in learning not to be swayed by other's judgements is to learn not to be judgemental yourself. The less you judge others, the more free you are of other's perceptions.

5.) Consider how you want to be remembered. When you're gone, people and those you love will not discuss what kind of car you drove, how big (or little) your thighs were or if you had great hair. They'll talk about the type of person you were. Wouldn't you like to be remembered as the artist of a custom-designed life?

This article had me falling asleep with a smile and I just wanted to share it! Included at the end of the article was a link to The High Pressure Friend and it was great as well!


Sherry ~ Cherie ~ ms. herbes de provence said...

Excellent article and excellent advice -- thanks for sharing this Missy. I particularly agree with the last one, which for me, sums up all the others. Be you. Love being you. Be the "you" you want to be remembered for. This has put such a smile on my face!

Rosemary said...

Thanks for that. We all need some of that advice from time to time.